Last month I wrote about social media and my dilemma on how to be on the various platforms. I wrote about a reality in my life. The next day I read Heather Cox Richardson’s newsletter and wanted to retract my blog, which in comparison seemed like insipid drivel. HCR wrote of the gutting of the CDC, the restricting of who gets Covid vaccines, Social Security data breaches, firings at the EPA, and the tariffs that have and will continue to wreak havoc with our economy. We are losing the civil servants who work to protect us from illnesses, identity theft, environmental degradation, the effects of climate change, and who strive to keep the economy on an even keel. Our tax dollars are not being used for our benefit.
HCR wrote about all of that and more, and I wrote about whether to be more consistent in posting pictures of my cat.
There are reasons for my doing so. Remaining sane to start. To dwell on the dismantling of our democracy, of the harm being inflicted on people in this country, and around the world, every day by the actions, and inactions, of our federal government, is bad for my mental health. I am outraged and saddened, and I don’t want to write about that. Remaining physically healthy is another. It’s been almost a year since a cardiac ablation stopped the electrical signals that made my heart go into atrial fibrillation (AFib). I can’t know for sure what brought the AFib on, but stress is a contributing factor. But the main reason I don’t engage with this US crisis in my blog is that my privilege allows me to prioritize my mental and physical health, at least for now. We are all in the same storm of the crumbling US democracy but we are not riding out this storm in the same boat.
I’m cisgender, straight, and white. The vulnerability of my gender in a patriarchal society is offset somewhat by the fact I am married to a benevolent cisgender straight white male. No matter my Armenian grandmother, after surviving the Genocide of 1915-1923, immigrated to the United States in 1930. No matter my father is a first-generation American citizen on his mother’s side. No matter because a 1909 US court case decided Armenians would be classified as white, the sorting of humans like buttons by color. White self-servingly considered superior to brown and black.
And the main reason I don’t feel compelled to write about the injustices occurring daily in my country is also the main reason I should: in theory, I can talk back to this extreme, corrupt, and inept federal administration with little if any serious consequences.
But then, I tell myself, people like HCR and Rebecca Solnit are writing better and with more impact than I could.
Still, keeping all of the above in mind, I do have something to say to this federal administration:
Hahahaha! Yes! That is the perfect surprise ending to your blog. It is SO important to stay sane and healthy in this moment, while doing all that we can. For me, the balance lies in the distinction of impact vs. control. For the first eight months of this disaster, I was lit by the idea that my actions could control the situation. It’s like being an oarsman in a Viking war ship: if one rower thinks the fate of the war depends entirely on him and rows that way, he won’t be there for the current battle. My letters and calls and marching have IMPACT, but I’ve let go of the illusion of CONTROL, and it’s been a game changer.
Also, I am so sorry to hear about the heart scare! That is unnerving, I am sure.
The distinction between impact and control is important. And to be able to let go of control, while still taking actions that make an impact, isn’t easy but is necessary for our sanity.
Thanks, it was unnerving! Glad you’re still writing——looking forward to your books!
Haha! Could not have concluded better…stuck the landing!
The world needs each of us to do our Work. Each of us makes our own ripple in the ocean, and it’s not helpful to replicate someone else’s ripple…although it is useful to consider/receive/welcome the influence from others. So many of us are not at the level of HCR or Solnit, and it’s nice to feel we’re not alone in finding our place in this moment.
Keep being you, Laura.
Thanks! The ending is pretty sweet, if I do say so myself. Yes, we each have our Work. Love your thoughts on this, beautifully said.
Well said…I couldn’t agree more! … with you and with Sliver!
Thanks, Aunt Pat!
Yes! Speaking from the same position of privilege, I feel like an imposter sometimes. But speak we must. And we must find a way to stay sane and well at the same time. Two things I know: writing brings me joy ( and keeps me sane); joining with others whether at a street protest or just in reading HCR’s newsletter gives me hope. Stay well, friend.
Thanks for sharing your two things. We need joy and hope, and connection with others.
Excellent! This is so good Laura. Love the ending ….puuuurfect
Thanks! Glad you enjoyed this.
the ending!
LOVE the ending. Apparently emojis don’t carry over.
Thanks for reading and commenting!